Saturday, October 4, 2008

Energy

I have been so exhausted lately that the word energy comes to mind.

Sleep is necessary, yet air and water...balance also. I have always allowed my
emotions to rule my actions. However, I have found myself at times to be depleted
of energy and once I go outside, the sunshine and air refresh me and I feel more energized.

I am not aware enough to know when an emotion has pulled me down - like recently. I have a catatonic response to doing the bills. I just don't want to pay them or wade through all that paperwork. So, what do I do?

Put it off. Put it off.

And, now, there are mountains of paper to wade through and great anxiety too. I've been there before. I know that if I start the negative feelings will lessen. But, here I stay for a while - like a deer in the headlights, mesmerized, as a car threatens to crush it...flattened to its death.

But...NO!!! There it is and I am looking at the headlights and don't move. Why not? Caught in the emotion.

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