normal: adjective 1. conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular.
Okay...so...in a group situation I suppose we human beings...even animals need norms. But...what about independent thinking. We as Americans value originality...original thinkers, right?
If you feel horrible, can't relate to others, feel you are on the outside...it isn't easy. I think all human beings feel this way sometimes. If it persists and greatly affects our actions in life...it may be damaging to our existence... to our physical and mental health.
When I worked as a "temp" in many offices...I saw so many political structures at NYC offices. I'll never forget this one real estate "Boss". His office was on Park Avenue and he referred to all who worked for him as "assholes". He would actually say, "Come here, Asshole!!"
I was shocked that these people who worked for him took his abuse. When the "real" asshole went to lunch...I asked them why they accepted to be treated this way. Because he's the Boss was their response.
Some people are not in therapy ... do not admit they need help ... make our lives DIFFICULT because they are abusive. Are they NORMAL? Has yelling and mistreatment of those working under the direction of a president, CEO, manager, principal or boss acceptable behavior???
Why do we tolerate this abuse? Money? Our paycheck? Does this behavior eat away at our self-esteem? Do we buy-in to the idea that it is okay for a boss to treat us poorly? Next time if a boss is yelling at you or treating you disrespectfully. Look him/her in the eyes and stand up to him/her.
You are not wrong to confront this person for their inappropriate behavior. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ALLOW IT! (Afraid to be fired? So...be wise and say what you have to say in a respectful manner. But...my advice is to say it and know you are actually helping this other "out-of-control" boss person learn an important lesson....you and others at your job are not doormats to wipe his/her feet. A boss can be in charge and respected only if he/she gives respect.
When the real estate "Boss" called me "honey", I told him that my name was not honey, but Nancy and to refer to me this way please. He smiled wryly, but stopped to call me "honey".
I think the definition for "NORMAL" should include being kind and respectful and when a person is in charge of others, he or she should realize they have MORE responsibility to think of others. Manipulating others out of fear seems to be a norm. Why do we play politics and give in?
If it is normal to allow those in power to shout and disrespect others...I don't want to be NORMAL.