Monday, May 19, 2008

Before Becoming ...

A chrystalis. The stage a butterfly goes through before it becomes a flying creature requires a type of cocooning, a hibernation period. Heck. If animals do it, maybe we need to do it too.

I am continuing to think of humans in relation to what is natural and refer back to the animal and plant world. The peacock is a very proud creature and pride is important.

Maybe...if a person is "raw", very sensitive...there is a need to cocoon - to protect oneself. In the animal world, bears hibernate, many animals seem to be programmed to avoid being another's prey.

I am thinking that is what I did when I was depressed, I cocooned. I felt as if I couldn't trust the others - like being others' prey. The humans. Funny. I am a very social person and want to connect, but depression makes you feel you will pull others down and they will shun you and so you stay in your "hole".

There is some truth to the fact that others may get upset with a depressed person. Negativity breeds negativity. Positivity breeds more positivity. If you want to check this out, stay around a lot of gossip. You will start to feel a little dirty or like you are involved in some dirty business. Talk about uplifting ideas and love, kindness, acceptance, helping others etc. and you will feel happier - more pure.

I learned a wonderful concept. Boundaries. If something is hurtful - I make one or I may let others know if they have stepped over a line. I really never used to do this. I was embarrassed or thought I would be rude or even that others had rights that I did not. I now know where this came from...but this blog is not about my therapy. It is about healing and joy or elation. When I see a strong sensitivity in another, or a boundary has been placed, I honor it.

Making boundaries can help lead to joy. If I protect myself...I am taking care of me. I recognize that I have limits. When I have to give and I want to give, I do. When I need to step back, I do.

5 comments:

Chris B. said...

Nancy,

What great insight that depression (and maybe even schizophrenia) is a form of "cocooning."

Spoke to this in other words, other ways, in a recent blog entry of my mine.

Cocooning. It's what I'm doing on this cold, rainy miserable day.

Cocooning in the living room.

Cheers,
Chris

nancy said...

Chris,

I do think we humans are always trying to achieve a balance. If the scales tip too much to one side, we try to adjust. So...it definitely makes sense to me that people for example: choose a safe place to avoid bad weather and also anything perceived as a threat to our well being physical as well as emotional.

Nancy

Olivier said...

True, hibernation and cocooning are a good metaphor about depression. Come to think of it, people who do not suffer from depression experience elation and sadness, too. And they have, as we all have, their own defence mechanisms. So it is possible that this is all a matter of intensity. But I believe that whatever took place at an early stage in life can be dramatically repeated in various forms that are unfortunately labeled pathological.

Olivier

hellophotokitty said...

Nancy,
your honesty and beauty are an inspiration to all of us who have traveled down the same path. Thank you once again for sharing and giving us hope

nancy said...

hellophotokitty,

thank you so much for your post! it feels right to share what took me thru great pain to learn. no pain no gain, right?

comedy is also a great medicine. grew up with my dad who was a lesser known stand-up comedian...

gotta release those endorphins!!!

have a great day!

nancy